ITI - Intimate Transformation Intensive

Hey guys! It is finally time for me to do a sharing of the big journey I was going through in January/February this year - the intensive program me and Manu did together, that was the reason why I went to Thailand with Manu in the first place. It feels a bit hard to even share my journey with you, cause to some extent it's indescribable - it’s such a deep feeling I have which can only be fully understood by the others who also were in the experience with me. And it almost feels like I would minimize my experience by putting words on it. But either way, you were many people asking about it so I feel I want to share a little without actually mentioning what we were doing. Cause that is also a big part of doing this kind of work, to not share your full journey in detail, cause that will first take away power from my journey and also ruin the experience for the ones coming next. For me it was SO valuable to no know everything that was going to happen, cause for my psyche I would have mentally prepared for it which wouldn’t have given me the biggest of outcome in the processes.  I truly needed this whole experience to melt into my being, for me to understand what difference it made within me, before I could share this.I had wanted to do this course for quite a while, since I heard about it a few years back once I was doing some other courses with the main facilitator and creator Justine Baruch. I really resonated with her work and how she was teaching, so I knew I wanted to learn more under her wings. Something very unique with this woman is that she is very experienced at what she does, does everything with her full presence and from the deepest space of her heart. She have managed to infused unusual topics together into a avant garde transformational journey. You can feel that this program is very well thought out to help all sorts of blockages you could experience in your life - cause it is planned on such an individual level even though it is group work. But oh boy how triggering it was from time to time haha. But that was exactly what I was looking for. For me what was one of the things that caught my attention was the amount of people in the course - only 12 people. I am just not the type of person who likes very big crowds when it comes to personal development work. And I had never heard of such a small and intimate space to do such deep work for a longer period of time. My first intention when I heard about this program years ago, was to do it alone. But universe had smoothly planned for it to happen now - so I could do it along side with my partner - which definitely gave a whole new spectrum of growth for me. We were only 12 people and 5 teachers holding space for us through out the journey. The amount of dedication and preparation we had to do before the program also showed in which depth we would all go together. All teachers were fantastic, Justine of course, she holds space like a queen in her kingdom, and then by her side a psychologist and 3 other help facilitators. I really had to put aside my work for a period before the course to only focus on the preparation work + during the actual program, you don't have time for anything else than actually focusing on your journey. It was another important factor for me, to put everything on hold to just focus on myself for a longer period. One of the most beautiful things with this journey was how it opened up for bigger ways of being a human, with less judgements and being more humble towards each and everyone in every moment. Because we all have out personal stuff, even though it doesn’t show from the surface. From when we all arrived and met all of these people and at first you felt so different to the others, til that you got to know all of everyones deepest shadows in such a vulnerable way that you could find a common ground with everyone. First I learnt so much about my own life journey, but then equally as much through witnessing all the others going through their processes. I will forever feel so close to all of the people in the group, it becomes like your little growth family - and some of them will be friends for life. It’s so much beauty in getting to know someone with having all your different cards on the table at once - cause you get so much respect, understanding and love for everyone. And to have a space where you can just open up fully in such big trust.  What is very different with this program rather than other personal development journeys I have had before or heard about - is that the sexuality aspects is very connected to many of the practices. And for me that was perfect and challenging at the same time, to include such a big important topic in the field of personal development. Cause our sexuality is affecting our life on so many different levels without us even knowing. There was definitely shocking moments, but in good ways. And I learned so much about why I have certain behaviors, desires and needs.  During this program I got two of my biggest insight of myself since I arrived on this earth. Clarity in some of my childhood traumas and how much they have affected me. How much I had suppressed without even being aware. How fear have been a part of my life in areas where fear is not necessary. And received tools how to move on without it. My biggest challenge through out the program was definitely in the grand final. I was exhausted of all the deep work and I was cornered by myself into some of my biggest insecurities. In the end I just had to let go of my limited beliefs and surrendered into my experience and I came out as a stronger woman. It was five blissful & full on challenging weeks and one integration week when the group was just meeting up for sharings. Straight after Manu decided to go for a 10 day meditation retreat so I had our house for myself - and that was exactly what I needed. Especially after being in such an intense journey with Manu for that long time, going through such highs and lows together, been challenged to the maximum and witness each other during. I would lie if I said it was easy - cause it definitely wasn’t. But I am so happy I did this journey. I feel if we could conquer that together - we can aim for the highest of mountains together. It was beyond great to do such a deep transformational journey together - and the understanding we have gotten of each other is on a whole new level.  Before this course I also did a period of coaching with Justine, for my personal evolution. And after all of this she has become a very close friend of mine and I will always have this woman close in my heart. She has helped me and Manu tremendously in our growth both individually and together. I will be forever thankful for this experience and for everyone who was a part of it. If anyone is interested there will be another round of ITI - Intimate Transformation Intensive next year in Koh Phangan. You can read more about it HERE <3So happy I have met a partner who is equally as committed as I am to growth <3